Chapters 3 through 9 of Why Don't You Want What I Want? cover the principles of engagement. Applying the six principles increases the likelihood that people will understand your idea, react favorably to it, and that you will be able to build their trust and confidence in you. Think of a typical situation in which you attempt to build support for your ideas and score each item on the scale of 1 to 7.

Know Your Intention
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Often my intention is to get my idea implemented without regard to what others want.	My intention when trying to influence someone usually includes the other person's interests as well as my own (I/You).
Consider the Context
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Often I assume that a good idea will succeed in spite of cues that suggest otherwise. (Or I may ignore these cues).	I consider a wide range of contextual cues in my planning & implementation. I want to know what the Level 2 & Level 3 conditions are that could have an impact on this process.
Avoid Knee Jerk Reactions
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I often react emotionally and defensively when others disagree strongly with my ideas.	I know what triggers me and have developed effective ways to keep from reacting without thinking through the potential consequences.
Pay Attention
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When I present an idea, I focus entirely on making sure my presentation is delivered well.	While attending to the quality of my presentation, I use subtle cues from the audience let me know if I am on or off track.
Explore Deeply
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I hate negative emotions and avoid them.	I believe that strong emotional reactions toward my idea hold valuable information. I have learned a number of ways to find out what's behind the anger or fear.
Find Ways To Connect
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People need to grow up. If I say to do something they should do it.	I believe that I can create the strongest commitment if I can tap into what's most important to those who need to go along. I am quite capable of engaging.